Notes to myself....
When one completely surrenders, with no fear of managing perceptions, what masks to keep, and what to let go, one can experience real bliss! Sometimes, it's as simple as just letting the universe take over. I had build up so much intent and providence moved; as if to put my inner world in sync with the outer; to just take over because the time had come; to give it to me because I deserve it. There's a kind of assurance in trusting the supreme power whatever term one uses to define this.
Going with the flow is and has been the law of nature, like dance; one movement beautifully unfolding into another. A synchrony, a rhythm; like making love; when you are completely undone and bare with no barriers and pretenses to keep and judgments to pass, there is a spontaneity which embodies complete surrender, that is real ecstasy, real liberation, real intimacy!
Real intimacy is rare -- that's what makes it precious. And it involves the revelation of one's self and the loving gaze upon another's true self (no makeup, no fancy car, no defensive charm, no seduction) -- that's what makes it so damn hard. Intimacy requires honesty and kindness in almost equal measure, trust and trustworthiness, forgiveness and the capacity to be forgiven… It's more than worth it.
To find myself in losing myself; I just went with it….
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